jealousy~

jealous. have you ever felt so? i bet you have. we all have. jealousy is the most natural feeling that humans have. since we're still so young, we've been jealous to everyone, about everything.

when i was in kindergarten i loved to perform traditional dance. me and some friends had at least once a week dance practise, and we're gonna perform it at the end of the school year. 

when D-day came, i was so excited, ready to rock, with my performing costume: super simple traditional clothes, with no thick make-up, no jeweleries, no accessories but a tiny batik scarf which can be used as a hair ornament. well it's fair, since the dance i was gonna perform is called "Tari Mendulang Intan", it is just about the life of the traditional countrywomen whose job is  panning for diamonds.

everything was so alright at the beginning, tapi semua berubah ketika negara api menyerang but it's no longer alright when i saw the dance group from another class. they're gonna perform "Tari Kipas", which i didn't even care what's that about, but i did really care about the costumes they wore. glam pink baju bodo with shiny goldy long necklace and sparkling brass bracelets. suddenly MY costume looked sucks. 

i was so pundung. then for the rest of my dance perfomance i refused to smile even a bit, doing my dance moves perfunctorily. ruined my one year dance practise. haha.

yeah jealousy sometimes brings us disaster if we can't maintain it correctly, as you can see in my story (i know, it's not a really relevant story anyway :p).

IMHO, jealousy is all about something good happens to other people which we wish to happen to us but it doesn't. yet. something good, like having things you really want, do come to some people just like that, with no effort. but for some people, it will come only if they are willing to fight. 

and for another people, however hard they fight to get that thing, they just can't have it. but there's one thing for sure: God is always fair. so you can't get something good you wanted? believe it, He's gonna give you something much better. 

:)